“Separation Anxiety help for parents”
|
This parenting articles & self help books site with free toddlers activity & kids arts and crafts activities guide has free self help books & parenting articles with positive parenting tips, free kids games, kids recipes, simple kids arts & crafts projects, free toddlers activity & kids art and craft ideas, including free child development parent tips for toddlers activities and toddlers parenting resources.
Situation: My child is afraid to leave my side to try new things or play with other children. How do I help him become more independent?
Think about it: It’s a big world out there. Some kids jump right in, and some need to test the water with their toes before they’re comfortable wading in. (And then they wade very slowly, of course!) Be patient.
With some gentle guidance your child will leave your side. (I mean, honestly, have you ever seen a ten-year-old super-glued to his mother’s side? Me neither.)
Don’t push: Don’t force your child to jump into situations he’s nervous about. Allow him to watch from the sidelines for a while to absorb the goings-on and get a feel for how he’ll fit into the picture. Let him know he can sit and watch for as long as he wants to before joining in. Many children relax when they know they have permission to take their time getting involved. Small steps: Provide opportunities for your child to take small steps towards independence. For example, take your child to a familiar park and once he’s involved in an activity move a short distance away, sit on a bench, and read a book. Every once in a while, touch base with him by waving or making a comment, “Wow! You’re sure going high.”
Don’t make it worse: Don’t overprotect your child. Saying things like, “Don’t worry, I’ll be right here if you need me” imply that your child really does have something to worry about. Instead, make your comments positive in nature and get the message across that what he’s about to do is no big deal. For example, when he’s leaving your side to attend a birthday party, let him leave on a positive note, “Have fun honey! See ya’ in a little while.”
Help him understand himself: Acknowledge his feelings, and help him understand them. Then reassure him and help him deal with the feelings and learn to get by them. “I can see you’re a bit nervous about joining the party. That’s okay. Take your time and let’s see who you know. There’s David! Why don’t you go over and show him your new watch?”
Take away the mystery: Talk about the event in advance. Let your child know what to expect, how long he’ll be there, what he’ll do, and when you’ll be back to pick him up. Information like this will help your child feel more comfortable about your separation.
Give your child choices. “You’ve been invited to sleep over at Brandon’s house Friday. He’s really excited. He said you’d go roller-skating and then make homemade pizza. Do you think you’d enjoy that?” Ask your child helpful questions to see why he doesn’t want to go.
Perhaps there’s something specific that would help him be more comfortable, maybe knowing that he can call you to pick him up if he changes his mind. Your child may not be comfortable and choose not to go.
That’s okay. There will be many opportunities for your child to spend time with a friend. Some more tentative children will pass on an invitation and be comfortable with their decision. Typically, given enough time, the child will outgrow this separation anxiety.
(Excerpted with permission by NTC/Contemporary Publishing Group Inc. from Perfect Parenting, The Dictionary of 1,000 Parenting Tips by Elizabeth Pantley, copyright 1999)
Parenting educator Elizabeth Pantley is president of Better Beginnings, Inc., a family resource and education company. Elizabeth is also the author of Hidden Messages: What Our Words and Actions Are Really Telling Our Children, Perfect Parenting: The Dictionary of 1,000 Parenting Tips, Kid Cooperation: How to Stop Yelling, Nagging and Pleading & Get Kids to Cooperate, The No-Cry Sleep Solution: Gentle Ways to Help Your Baby Sleep Through the Night, and The Successful Child: What Parents Can Do to Help Kids Turn Out Well, a joint effort with Dr. William and Martha Sears. Elizabeth is also a regular radio show guest and frequently quoted as a parenting expert in magazines such as Parents, Parenting, Working Mother, Woman's Day, Good Housekeeping, McCalls, and Redbook and on over 50 parent-directed Web sites. She publishes a newsletter, “Parent Tips,” that is distributed in schools nationwide. Visit Elizabeth at www.pantley.com/elizabeth /
Try a local search of our site for your answers
back to HOME PAGE for free self help books & parenting articles
===============================================
SITE DISCLAIMER: The self help books and parenting personal development resources on this site are not intended to be a substitute for therapy or professional advice. While all attempts have been made to verify information provided in this self help book and personal development publication, neither the author nor the publisher assumes any responsibility for errors, omissions or contrary interpretation of the self help books and personal development subject matter herein. There is no guarantee of validity of accuracy of any self help books and articles content. Any perceived slight of specific people or organizations is unintentional. This self help books and personal development articles website and its creators are not responsible for the content of any sites linked to.
The self help book and articles website contents are solely the opinion of the author and should not be considered as a form of therapy, advice, direction and/or diagnosis or treatment of any kind: medical, spiritual, mental or other. If expert advice or counseling is needed, services of a competent professional should be sought. The author and the Publisher assume no responsibility or liability and specifically disclaim any warranty, express or implied for any self help or otherwise products or self help or otherwise services mentioned, or any self help or otherwise techniques or practices described. The purchaser or reader of this self help book and personal development articles website publication assumes responsibility for the use of these self help personal development materials and self help books and personal development articles and information. Neither the self help author nor the self help book Publisher assumes any responsibility or liability whatsoever on the behalf of any purchaser or reader of these Self help books, Toddlers activity, kids arts and crafts, toddler crafts, free kids crafts, toddler toys, parenting resources materials.
Self help books, Toddlers activity, kids arts and crafts, toddler crafts, free kids crafts, toddler toys, parenting resources for happiness & personal development resources, Self help books, Toddlers activity, kids arts and crafts, toddler crafts, free kids crafts, toddler toys, parenting resources, free self help books and self help articles listed for your convenient self help books for happiness personal development search in the self help books and articles subjects of self image, Self help books, Toddlers activity, kids arts and crafts, toddler crafts, free kids crafts, toddler toys, parenting resources for parent tips on being happy self help emotion management, panic attack self help, self help for low self esteem, self help famous quotes, anxiety self help resources, Self help books, Toddlers activity, kids arts and crafts, toddler crafts, free kids crafts, toddler toys, parenting resources for stress management self help books, articles, tips and depression self help books, articles and resources.
===============================================
Back to Top of self help books and personal development articles page
