“5 Ways to Become More Likeable”
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Man is a social animal, as Aristotle once said. This want and need to belong and be accepted by others is what drives us to be civil toward others. In fact, there might be times when we want nothing but to see our intimidators get run over by a bus (yikes!) but we choose to endure the pressure and react in an amiable manner in order to merit niceties, as well. In order to achieve this kind of response from everyone we meet, we must strive to be likeable.
Now, likeability does not always entail that people will throw a party every time you come into the room. A person can be likeable yet not grandstanding. You don't really have to be popular to be one. All you need to do is adjust your attitude and outlook in life toward the positive. When you feel good about yourself and always look at the bright side of things, your likeability factor will naturally rise.
Here are five ways to become more likeable in any situation.
1) Think happy thoughts
According to Peter Pan, think happy thoughts and you will fly. This applies to your attitude toward the challenges that come your way. For instance, if you received low marks for your exam, don't think of it as the end of the world. Instead, be grateful it happened because it will motivate you to study harder and manage your time better next time. Behind every dark cloud is a silver lining. If you keep this as your mantra, you will never have to harbor depressing thoughts ever again.
2) Contribute something
Whether its a group project or a personal endeavor, contributing something of value, no matter how small makes a big difference. If you compare a person who always mutters about how difficult a task is and a person who acknowledges the difficulty but tries to lighten the mood by finding humor in the activity, you'd want to go with the latter, right? If you want to be likeable, don't put others down and bear more weight on a challenging activity.
3) Rein your insecurities in
There is none more annoying than a person who throws a pity party for himself or herself. Examples of insecure people are those who always have to be right at everything, those who always say 'just kidding' at the end of every comment, and those who do not know how to laugh at themselves and their mistakes. An insecure person is a crab. A crab is animal that brings everybody down when he or she is down. If you want to have more friends, don't be one. You don't have to apologize for everything you say with 'just kidding.'
4) Believe in what you are saying and stick to it
A person who keeps changing his or her opinion or merely mimics what other people are saying about a particular event or object not only has zero personality but a very low likeability rate, as well. You don't need to have an opinion about everything -- that would be equally annoying, but you don't need to say 'yes' to what others say either. You'll only end up looking like a desperate sycophant.
5) Avoid judging others
Finally, if you don't want to be judged, don't judge. First impressions might sometimes put you off but it pays to know the other person better than to immediately make conclusions about his or her character. Judgmental people, if you notice, are the ones who usually eat alone at the cafeteria because his or her colleagues are tired of hearing him or her point out the flaws of others. Surely you don't want to be this person.
Power through People
Have you come across a naturally friendly person? Put him in a room of strangers and he will be a friend to almost everyone in no time!
We call such individual a people-person. He is unbelievably nice and charismatic that he can charm anyone into doing anything.
A socially empowered person achieves greatness because of the people who catapult him to success. He earns the trust and all-out support of people whom he had helped before. He can do anything with the plethora of people behind him. All because he knows how to maximize his social potential!
If you develop social skills, you will achieve self-empowerment. Self-empowerment is similar to doing a general overhaul in your life. This will turn your self into a happier and more successful person. If you can be one of those persons, then there wouldn’t be any reason why you will not succeed. You just have to know how to start. Here are some steps:
1. Be genuine.
Be genuinely nice and interested in people. Hypocrisy will just bring you down. Once they perceive that you are Mr. Hypocrite with selfish intentions, you might as well say goodbye to self-empowerment.
2. Be the greatest listener that you can be.
To earn the love and trust of other people, you must listen to their problems and sympathize with them. Do not just hear them out. Listen to them with your heart. Make eye contact when the person talks to you. Listen as if every word matters for it does. You earn brownie points when they find out that there is a confidante in you.
3. Laugh aloud.
You need not force yourself to laugh at every joke cracked by someone. This means finding humor in things and not being too darn serious. A person oozing with an awesome sense of humor attracts crowds and eventually, attracts success.
4. Don't forget yourself.
While fluttering around like a social butterfly, you might forget yourself and eventually allow everyone to always push you around. Remember to love and value yourself before anyone else. If you deem yourself respectable and worthy of affection, people will flock to you and not treat you like a doormat.
5. Do random acts of kindness.
You don't have to be a John Rockefeller and blow your savings to charity. Little acts of kindness matters most and this can be as simple as giving someone a surprise “take care” card or helping an elderly cross the street. When we were in kindergarten, kindness was taught to us. Now is the time to revive the act of doing good deeds and this time, let these acts stay for good.
6. Contact your old friends.
It is sad how some friendships simply wither and end but thanks to technology, you can do something about it. Relive the good old days by flipping your yearbook. Find great people whom you want to communicate with again. Adding these old friends to your roster of support peers will surely make you feel good all over.
7. Develop your personality.
Are you grouchy, grumpy, and generally morose? Whoa! You can't go through life with those. Get rid of the bad traits and habits that perpetually hamper your growth. Really, who wants a grouchy friend anyway?
8. Be confident.
Be able to stride to the other corner of the room and introduce yourself to people with that winning smile of yours. Just remember: be confident. Exude confidence, not arrogance.
9. Practice control.
When you feel angry, don't snap at anyone. Never throw a tantrum. Stay calm and collected. Be adult enough to take control of the situation and transform your anger into something more productive and positive.
10. Nurture your relationships.
Relationships with your family, friends, and significant others are too precious to be neglected whatever happens. Go out and have fun with them. Do things together. Happiness will never fly from your side as long as the people who matter most are close to you.
In the end, using people for self-empowerment means becoming a better and more lovable person. Focus on creating win-win situations to achieve self-empowerment!
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