“How to manage your fears”
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Imagine discovering a way to get rid of your fears in aquick and painless manner. In fact it can even become fun!
Did you know only two of all the fears you have are innate:
The fear of falling and the fear of loud noises.
Most ofyour fears were learned in early childhood and then in laterlife under stressful conditions.
Traditional therapeutic approaches would probably have youtrying to figure out where your fear originally came from.
Maybe they'd have you digging around in your childhoodmemories, recalling times you ate the next-door neighbourspurple Tulips.
This type of approach tends to associate theclient into reliving unpleasantness and can take a long timeto achieve useful results.
Personally I think this style isway out of date and bordering on torture.
You'll probably be glad to know we're not going to be doinganything like that. The truth is you can easily and quicklyundo the learnings that created specific fears and changeyour responses to something much more useful.
So just how do fearful feelings occur then? Well lets use acommon example: Fred wants a raise and he's been wanting toask his boss for months. Finally he decides to go and ask. BUT when he starts the walk down the corridor he starts tofeel certain sensations in his body. Weird stomach feelings.His breathing is constricted.
Slight sweating on parts ofhis body. His vision is effected. Fred decides to turn backand then sits down feeling slightly annoyed with himself.
His body started producing 'fear chemicals.' What happened?
"Well it was because he defied his Dad one time when he wasfour. Let's explore those forgotten memories...."
NO! NO! NO! Let's do something much smarter and definitelymore fun.
Hey Fred come over here I want to show you something reallycool! O' come on, pick your lip up.
You know how before you got up to go and ask the boss for araise, you felt OK right? So between the time you got up andstarted walking something happened.
Something triggeredthose feelings in you. Here's a fact for you: You eithermade a picture in your head or talked to yourself in a waythat created those fearful sensations and that happened atan unconscious level out of your awareness.
"OK Colin that might be true but so what, what's yourpoint?"
Well the point is by changing the internal sounds, picturesand voices in your head you can begin to gain control ofyour emotions.
"Fair enough but how can I do that so when I'm in a similarsituation I automatically make useful pictures, sounds andvoices in my head so I remain in a resourceful state?"
Good question, here's just one way you can achieve the results you want using a simple and powerful tool from thefield of Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP)
=== Soothing Movie Music ===
1.Think of a situation where you feel fear.
2.Dissociate: See yourself in the situation like you would amovie with you in it.
3.Imagine running the memory from the END of the fearfulsituation, BACKWARDS to the START. Do this very fast in lessthen 1 second!
4.Think of some music that makes you feel the opposite offear. For example soothing classical music makes you feelrelaxed. Perhaps certain rock or dance music makes you feelenergised/courageous etc.
5.Now hear the music, nice and loud, inside your mind whilstlooking at yourself going through the situation from START to END.
6.Break state. Now think of the situation you choose in Step1 and notice how your fearful feelings have diminished.
7.What will you see or hear just before you want this newfeeling to set in?
Colin G Smith is a licensed Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) and author of 'The NLPToolBox', a personal development book that enables thereader to master any area of their life with amazing speed.Complete information on Colin G Smith's books are availableat his website, including a FREE personal development eBook.
www.NLPToolBox.com
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