“ Understanding Emotions and Appraising Ourselves”
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Happiness, Health, Wealth and wellbeing self help books and personal development articles about improving your Happiness, Health & Wealth, increasing your wisdom on how to be happy, higher self esteem using self help resources like self help site with free self help books on being happy with loving relationships, high self esteem & self confidence using self actualization and higher self esteem self growth resources. There are large classes of emotions that relate to how we look at and appraise ourselves.
One such set of emotions involves feelings of success and failure.
When we do something we consider a success, we usually experience positive feelings.
If we do something we consider a failure, we may experience negative feelings.
Standards of success
What determines whether something is a success and a failure? Two basic factors are involved: the standard that people set for us and the standard that we set for ourselves.
Usually we feel most successful when our performance reaches other people's expectations or standards as well as our own.
Sometimes, however, we set our standards so high that we never can do well enough to feel that we have succeeded, even though others tell us we have done well.
Or others may set their expectations of us so high that, although we think we have done well, they feel that we should have done better. Fortunately, people generally set reasonable goals for themselves with which other people agree. This is why most people feel they can and do succeed.
Related to feelings of success and failure are feelings of pride and shame. We are proud of ourselves when we succeed at things we do, while we may feel varying degrees of shame if we feel we have failed. Did you ever receive a poor grade at school that made you feel so ashamed that you didn't want to tell anyone?
Not only do we feel pride and shame for ourselves; we can feel these emotions for others as well. For example, we may feel pride for a friend if he scores the winning point at a soccer match, while we might feel shame for the same friend if at the last minute he tripped over the ball and lost the game. A common, mild form of shame is embarrassment, and, like shame, we can feel it for ourselves and for others.
If we make a mistake or do something that we feel is morally wrong, or bad, we may feel the emotion of guilt. Guilt is a very unpleasant emotion, one that most people experience as distressing or painful.
However, like all emotions, guilt serves as an important function, for it helps to keep us acting and behaving in ways that will be helpful, not harmful, to others.
Can you imagine a world without guilt? Without guilt, people would be more apt to lie, steal, abuse or kill for what they wanted. Guilt is the emotion most related to the religious and moral structure of society.
Just as too little guilt can be a problem, so can too much guilt. Some people feel so bad about themselves that they can never be happy; they feel that everything they do is wrong or worthless. For these people, unfortunately, professional treatment might be necessary.
Love and hate
Our feelings toward other people are often complex. We may love someone and, at the same time, be angry with him. Or we may love someone, even though we are jealous of him. We might even love someone and, at the same time, hate him for some specific reason.
Hate is a strong negative emotion toward someone, and is due to anger, jealousy, or some other factor.
Like love, hate can be a very strong emotion. It can also be very dangerous. The question is often asked, "Is it bad to hate?" The best answer to this is probably, "sometimes yes and sometimes no".
Usually, hate does not help us; it makes us feel unhappy and makes us do things that may hurt others. However, sometimes it may be necessary to hate and hurt someone in order to protect loved ones.
Happiness and higher self esteem wellbeing self help books and personal development articles about improving your Happiness, Health & Wealth, increasing your wisdom on how to be happy, and using self help resources like self help site with free self help books on being happy with loving relationships, high self esteem & self confidence using self actualization and self growth resources higher self esteem.
The 3 Most Powerful Ways to Get Yourself to Achieve ANYTHING Despite Pressure, Deadlines, and “Procrastination”
By Kacper M. Postawski of www.PowerfulSleep.com
This powerful PDF report is brought to you by www.PowerfulSleep.com , where you’ll learn
how to supercharge your sleep system to sleep less, and have more time and energy in
your life.
How free and energized would you feel if you had the power to motivate yourself to do
ANYTHING, stop procrastinating, and achieve all your goals in record time?
Have you ever had a concrete plan to succeed at something, but for some “inner” reason
what you planned to do never got done? We all have plans and huge dreams when we’re
young, but very few people ever get past the point of taking ACTION on those dreams?
Is it because people are lazy? Or is there an inner science to achievement?
My mission is to deliver you cutting edge information to help you super-charge your life,
not just your sleep system. So in this issue of the Peak performance newsletter, I’d like
to deliver to you 3 of the most powerful and impacting ways to conquer self-sabotage
and get you to where you want to be in your life at lightening speed. I have personally
used these tools in my life and the results have been mind-blowing. Here we go!
What is Success?
People have many different definitions for success and failure. I’d like to give you my
own definition before we move on.
Success happens whenever you decide to do something and you DO IT. Or whenever
you decide to NOT DO something and you DON’T do it.
I know it sounds simple, but 99% of people can’t even do just that! Sure, everyone talks
a lot about doing things, but hardly many people actually take action on what their
supposedly high priority goals and dreams are. I know I’ve been in the same place!
One of the most important concepts I’ve learned in my life is that 90% of Success is
taking ACTION on the goal you have. 10% is the mechanics, knowledge, or resources
you need to succeed. Whatever you want in your life, you have the power to acquire the
knowledge, to get the mechanics or resources you need, it’s taking action on that goal
that is the biggest obstacle on the road to success in most people.
If anyone can succeed, and all it takes is ACTION, why doesn’t everyone take action to
achieve their goals everyday?
Power Method #1) Pain and Pleasure
If you learn nothing else this year but this concept, your whole life will change. The
person who has popularized this concept and changed thousands of lives with it most is
Anthony Robbins
The human mind is consciously and subconsciously motivated by two basic forces.
1. The need to AVOID PAIN
2. The need to GAIN PLEASURE.
If you think about it, every single action you take in your life is driven by the need to
avoid pain, and the need to gain pleasure. The need to avoid pain is always STRONGER
than the need to gain pleasure.
For example: If you have $10,000 and you have two options
Choice a) Go for a 4 day trip to Hawaii.
Choice b) Pay $10,000 to remove a tumor from your brain.
Allow me to give you a powerful example of how to instantly apply this into your life to
start creating results TODAY. Here’s a personal example of how I used this concept to
create the Powerful Sleep system.
I had been planning to finally write an eBook about my research in sleep for about a
month, but I kept on putting it off, why? Frustrated with a lot of things in my life, I
decided to give this Pain & Pleasure concept a Try. I drew a PAIN and PLEASURE
graph like the one below of my current situation, and then drew one of the outcomes I
wanted.
Current Situation:
PAIN PLEASURE
1. Writing the book would take too much time… I don’t have time
2. It would be super stressful, I would have to stay up at night and do even more
research on how to create and write this so it’s perfect.
3. What if I write it and no one will read or buy it? It will be a waste of time
Pleasure
Or –
1. When the book is finished I could help a lot of people with the information and
improve other’s lives.
2. When the book is finished, I’ll have extra money coming in.
As you can see, my need to AVOID PAIN was pushing me in the direction not taking any
action. It’s also known as “procrastination”. The only difference between people who
procrastinate and people who succeed with taking action, is the associations of PAIN and
PLEASURE they have with doing something. I look at my pain and pleasure sheet, and
thought of how I could focus my associations to push me into taking action instantly.
Here was my new sheet.
Write new sheet here.
As you can see, I created immense pain around NOT DOING the tasks, I clearly wrote
out and visualized how this would look and feel. The pain of NOT WRITING the book
was now greater than the one of writing it.
My values of contributing to the world and
creating something special were now at stake. To further hammer the nail in, I clearly
described the immense pleasure visually, emotionally, and kinesthetically of how it will
feel when the task is done.
With all the arrows in my mind pulling me away from pain
and into pleasure, I was on my way that very same minute.
You’re reading this article now as a result of that PAIN & PLEASURE sheet I wrote
down! This concept is so powerful, I urge you to do it as soon as you’re done reading
this article.
Take at least one action you’ve been putting off in your life, whether it is a goal to lose
weight, to create more money, or improve a relationship. Take that action, create a pain
and pleasure sheet like the one above and see how rapidly motivated you will be to
achieve that goal.
Here’s another example of someone trying to lose weight.
Power Method #2) Chunking
The second reason why people don’t take action on what they want to achieve TOO BIG
inside of their head. Often a simple goal like going to the gym to work out becomes a
number of PAINFUL things.
1. I have to go get the keys to my car.
2. I have to put my work out clothes on, and iron them because they’re all wrinkly.
3. I gotta go to my car and drive there through traffic.
4. Once I get there they’ll make me sign up for a membership.
5. Once I am signed up they’ll give me a 2 hour tour of the place and try to upsell
me even more membership options which I don’t want!
6. Then I gotta work out for an hour, and I’ll get all sweaty.
7. I have to drive home with all that sweat on me.
8. Once I’m home I’ll have to shower, and by then I’ll have no time to do anything
else!
“Forget it! I’m watching TV! Going to the gym is too complicated and too painful”
Chunking, and the Rule of 3s
Our conscious mind can usually hold only a number of things to do at once. Whenever
there is more things to do than the conscious mind can handle, we feel overwhelmed and
stop everything completely. What I realized after a while is that nothing is really as big
as we make it out to be. We just have a habit to make things bigger than they are.
The above gym example could be brought down to three simple steps:
1. Go to the gym
2. Work out
3. Feel great and energized!
Whenever you find yourself feeling blocked or procrastinating, think of the way you are
chunking down the goal into steps? Are you thinking of ALL the things you have to do,
and how PAINFUL they will be? If you are, chunk them down into 3 steps. As you
focus on these steps, you’ll find you’ll feel much more balanced and relaxed about the
goal!
Power Method #3) State Management
“I’m not in the mood today, I’ll do it tomorrow.”
“I really don’t FEEL like doing that right now.”
Have you ever heard someone say these things? Perhaps you say them to yourself on a
regular basis? The bottom line is that if you wait around to feel in the right mood or
emotional state to do something, it’s most likely never going to happen.
99% of people in the world have no control over how the feel. They either wake up
happy, or they don’t. They have a “bad day” or a “good day.” To these kinds of people it
seems that the way we feel is some kind of mystical enigmatic force that we have no
control over.
Part of success is being able take ACTION despite FEAR, PAIN, and UNCOMFORT.
Taking action even when you’re not in the friggen moooooooooooooooooood.(*whiny
voice*)
Instead of waiting for an emotional state to come to you, use state management methods
to create the emotional state you need to achieve your goals.
Super-Charging Your Emotional State
Your emotions are dependant on 2 primary factors:
1) What you focus on
2) What you do with your body
1. Changing Your Focus
Example: Jill’s goal is to lose 50 lbs, after a week of working out 3 times per week and
changing her eating habits, she steps on the scale and notices that she only lost 1 lb.
Feeling like she isn’t moving towards her goal fast enough, she instantly begins to feel
disappointed and discouraged about continuing her quest to lose weight.
“Don’t let the present moment determine your outcome!”
One of the biggest secrets of success I’ve learned over time is that the current moment
has nothing to do with your outcome! Often we get caught up with a depressing situation,
we focus on it to the point where the emotions get strong enough to stop us.
At this point, instead of focusing on what seems like a failure to Jill, she could change her
focus to the actual OUTCOME she wants. Which is feeling great, sexy and attractive.
Feeling free and healthy.
As you change your focus in critical times that would usually stop you emotionally, you
create incredible power to move despite discomfort!.
2. Using Your Body to Create Energy!
In the Powerful Sleep system I write about using this method at specific times of your
day to optimize your inner sleep system to lessen your sleep and create an abundance of
energy in your life.
Changing your focus is just “positive thinking”, until you add this method into your state
management arsenal.
The fastest and easiest way to create an emotional state shift in your mind, and to give
your body the energy it needs to propel you to your goals, is to make a drastic change in
what you’re doing with your body.
You’ve got to move fast, you’ve got to get your heart rate going, and you’ve got to make
it impactful!
Example:
Often times when I’m faced with several writing deadlines for books, articles and
interviews, I spend a lot of time sitting at my desk thinking. Getting work done on the
computer is great, but there’s only one challenge: My body isn’t doing anything!
It gets to the point where my emotional drive begins to drop. At this point, instead of
stopping my work an taking “a break” like most people do, I run into the back-yard, and
jump for 10 minutes on my trampoline while thinking of all the things I want for my life
and the lives of the people I affect with my work! By the time I get back in front of my
laptop, I am supercharged with energy, ideas, creativity, and emotional drive!
What ways can you think of to create more energy and a better emotional state at key
points during your day?
Because your emotional state is so critically important to achieving your goals, and the
overall quality of your life, I urge to start using this technique in your life. Changing what
you’re doing with your body doesn’t have to be as drastic as jumping on a trampoline
whenever you’re in a down state.
It could be as simple as getting up and clapping your
hands for a minute while visualizing your goal. It can be going outside for a breath of air
or a short jog, a stretch, or even just putting on a smile
When you combine all three of these methods: Leveraging your pain and pleasure
associations, chunking down your processes, and managing your emotional state, you’ll
find that you become unstoppable in your journey to success.
“Dreams and goals are only vapor until you take action on them.”
– Mark Joyner, Internet Marketing Millionaire
Your Friend,
Kacper M. Postawski
Co-Founder
www.PowerfulSleep.com
PS. Do you have your copy of Powerful Sleep – Secrets of the Inner Sleep clock? Get it
today and start benefiting from a supercharged sleep system, less sleep, more free time
and an incredible abundance of energy in your life that you never knew existed. Click here to grab it now
PPS. The Powerful Sleep system is only available online for $47 for a very limited time,
the whistle could blow any day for the price to go up because of the constant price testing
my marketing team is doing on the package. Click here to grab it now.
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